I like getting matches on tinder because it makes me feel like I’m not as ugly as I know I am

Reblogged from ayy lmao
  • citizen: it's a bird!
  • citizen: it's a plane!
  • *superman flies down with kryptonite between his teeth*
  • superman: it's a metaphor
Reblogged from Liam Dryden
cruxia:

salamifuposey:

superhamish:

He’s gonna try and sell that energy ball to tom nook 

i can’t
I’m laughing so hard right now I’m in tears

cruxia:

salamifuposey:

superhamish:

He’s gonna try and sell that energy ball to tom nook 

i can’t

I’m laughing so hard right now I’m in tears

Reblogged from Liam Dryden

covetxvx:

a metaphor of my life

Reblogged from what the funk?

grrrl-anachronism:

Imagine if people dismissed other forms of communication the way they do the internet.

“Why are you being such an asshole to me?”

“OH MY GOD THIS IS THE TELEPHONE! Stop taking it so seriously!”

Reblogged from Liam Dryden
  • JESSE EISENBERG: People on the street say mean things to me.
  • INTERVIEWER: Like what?
  • JESSE EISENBERG: I get called Napoleon Dynamite because I have curly hair. I live in New York City and I ride a bicycle. I always bike down 9th Avenue and there’s this kid who goes to school there named Abraham. Every time I pass him, he calls me Napoleon Dynamite. He screams it out and his friends laugh. That was a fine movie but I wasn’t in it.
  • INTERVIEWER: What do you say back?
  • JESSE EISENBERG: I say, “Please, Abraham, I’m not that man.”

liamdryden:

neilcicierega:

fororchestra:

Brodyquest For Orchestra

iTunes, Bandcamp, Amazon, G+, More

Purchases support me and composer Neil Cicierega

Brodyquest: Gold Edition

excuse ME

Reblogged from Liam Dryden
gamecuboid:

I was doing some gaming and my iTunes decided to interrupt me like a little french bitch

gamecuboid:

I was doing some gaming and my iTunes decided to interrupt me like a little french bitch

Reblogged from Liam Dryden
humansofnewyork:

"If you could give one piece of advice to a large group of people, what would it be?""Keep your word.""What’s a time that you didn’t keep your word, that you now regret?""When I was younger, I told a friend that I’d go with her to get an abortion. And I never showed up."

humansofnewyork:

"If you could give one piece of advice to a large group of people, what would it be?"
"Keep your word."
"What’s a time that you didn’t keep your word, that you now regret?"
"When I was younger, I told a friend that I’d go with her to get an abortion. And I never showed up."

Reblogged from Humans of New York
Reblogged from enjoy the silence
jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,  It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,
It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor

Reblogged from Well, okay then.
mackllewhore:

its a metaphor, you see. you place your cursor right upon the killing thing, but you dont actually click on it.

mackllewhore:

its a metaphor, you see. you place your cursor right upon the killing thing, but you dont actually click on it.